Spiders

So… I have a pretty lame and crazy fear of spiders. Its not so bad that I’ll pee my pants at the sight of one… But, if surprised, do expect some sort of fabulous jumpy/crazy/squealy/flail arms in the air move. Fact: I have no control over this reaction. Fact: this does embarrass the hubs. 😉

A special spider story to share: I’ve mentioned before how blind I am without glasses… But, I need to mention it again: I can barely see ANYTHING without some sort of contacs or eyewear. This brings me to a little spider story… I was 12… And, had just lost my glasses (umm… I did not lose them. I “lost” them on purpose. But, that’s another story). I was getting ready for bed and, of course, everything was a big ‘ol blur. I was about to get in bed and saw what I thought to be a piece of bark dust (from my pet rat’s cage) on my brwon blanket. I picked it up to throw it away… and, it fell out of my hand. I picked it up a second time and again: it fell out of my hand. So, I’m determined to remove this crazy bark dust piece from my freshly cleaned room and picked it up one more time. Finally. It didn’t fall out of my hand… Wait..  Something’s weird..  Why did this piece of bark dust keep falling out of my hand? I moved my hand closer to my fuzzy eyes for inspection… OMG: it was the biggest bark dust colored spider I had ever seen (and, had ever held up to my eyes)!!! I threw my hands up in the air and ran out of my room dancing and screaming like a maniac. I had to get my mom to help me find the spider before I went to bed… Since I was too blind to find it.

Special spider story two: A couple years after the bark dust spider incident…. here I was again… sleeping so innocently in my bed. I opened my eyes to a lovely morning… still a little blurry… wait, what is that? My sleepy eyes focused on a spider chillin’ on my pillow about 6 inches from my face… with his 2 front legs up in the air! Oh man! I jumped up so fast and freaked the -hoo ha hey- out! I have no idea what ever happened to that spider… but, I assume he was maybe just dancing… or, trying to say hello? Maybe? Sometimes I like to pretend that maybe he just didn’t know what to do with his hands in this awkward situation. You know… watching me while I sleep. Spider: “Hmmm, I don’t know what to do with my hands…. ummm, pockets? Dang, I don’t have pockets. Throw my hands in the air? Yeah. That’s good. Heeeeeey, good morning!”

And, most recently: I tweeted about this a month or two ago… I picked up my glass of water to drink it… and stopped when I noticed a spider in the dang thing! Why? Why, spider, why?
Any lovely spider stories to share? Wait… don’t share…. I may not sleep tonight! Ok, wait… tell me. Oh, no. Don’t. Ok. Do. 😉

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