My day off: Repeat

Well, I decided to take Monday off! Yay! So, I’d like to share a little repeated post with you all… It’s titled, “Don’t Like It? Move On.” I wrote this post in July. Enjoy, and I’ll see you all tomorrow!


I’ve said it before (and, I’m pretty sure I will say it again), if you don’t like what you see or hear: move on.

The other day I was working on my computer, at Starbucks, while my friend entertained my girl for the day. I sat there for hours… Bought some food… had a ton of caffeine. Customers were coming and going. A couple hours into my Starbucks visit, these two ladies came in. Took a seat one table away from mine. I would never have noticed them, but some how their conversation wandered its way into my brain. I tried to keep working. But, now I was having a hard time focusing. I couldn’t stop listening to the gossip and negative conversations they were sharing. They spent 40 minutes putting down a beloved house guest, followed by their hate towards many family members, and even a couple of local shops they despised. There was not ONE single positive thing these ladies had to say. I kid you not. For over an hour. I couldn’t take it anymore, so I moved. I changed seats. I was now out of ear shot from them. I no longer had to listen to their gossipy mean chat. I made the choice: move my butt, so I no longer have to listen to these ladies.

I did not enjoy hearing them. I moved on. I moved quite a few tables away. I’m happy I did, because these ladies sat there for another hour: I did not hear that last hour… Thank goodness.

My point to that whole story, if you don’t like what you see or hear: get out of there. I’ve had my fair share of negative comments and feedback (whatever, brush it off), but I still can’t understand why anyone would continue to come back and read something they hate. Why read a blog, follow their twitter, Facebook, and instagram if you despise them? Or, why would you want to go to a blog that is, in your opinion, never interesting. Is it just so you can join in the gossip? Calling people ugly and stupid is fun? I don’t know.

I chose to start a blog when Ruari was a few months old. I wanted to meet other mama’s with newborns. AND, I did. PLUS, I found this amazing community of bloggers. It’s been awesome. BUT, when you blog you’re opening a door to a part of your life for the world to learn and read about, which is actually a little scary. This is my blog. I am my boss. How I am on my blog, and in real life… is me. I can be shy, I can be nice, I can have a bad day. I am never intentionally mean. Never. But, here’s a fact: Hiding behind an anonymous profile… talking crap about someone… means you’re a coward. When you look up my phone number, call me with a blocked number, and curse me out on a message, (including saying stuff about my daughter)… you are officially a complete and utter creepster. Yup. You now live in creepville.

I’ve been trying my best to move forward and continue to work on myself and PTSD, then I read some mean words, comments, and get a weird ass phone call… And, I feel myself taking a step backward in this whole process. So, I choose to ignore it. As much as I want to look over and watch the train wreck of words, I ignore. I will not support it. There will always be mean spirited people out there with weird, random, unrealistic things to say about you. But, oh well. I choose to look away and ignore the hurtful things people will say about me. I choose to accept the fact that: maybe not everyone I meet will like me (believe me, that’s the hardest part. I don’t like to not be liked… Or, even hated). But,whatever. I know me. I have readers that truly enjoy me, and I enjoy them (I’ve made some amazing connections through this blog, and can’t wait to make more). I can’t win them all over (even when I want to). But, do I really want to? I don’t like negative/toxic friendships… and, I don’t put up with them. SO, I think I’m glad I can’t win them all over.

I make some money on my blog. Yes! I do. I do some sponsored posts. Yup, I do. Yes, I allow some companies to put their logos on some posts… I think it’s awesome I can get paid  for something I would have written about already. I run a for profit blog. I don’t hide that fact. Heck yeah! I get to stay home with my daughter. Holy crap! We get to play my little ponies and learn how to garden. Yes! I am happy. Yes, I have bad days, but luckily: they’re will be a lot less when I ignore all that negativity. I can and will focus on the positive. <3

I have the power to hit delete on those mean comments, and I make the choice to ignore all the negativity.

The true ugly: mean.

Tags: ,

Categories: about me


  • Dory Smith Graham on said:

    Do what you need, want and love to do. Enjoy yourself and lots of us will enjoy right along with you. Best.

  • Trish on said:

    Oh my goodness! I am new to blogging and it blows me away that people actually take the time to hurt someone else. I can't even imagine finding something on the internet that I hate so much, i feel the need to make a nasty comment. I have found things that I'm not that into, and I simply move on. But really? Spending your precious time insulting other bloggers? You are right, totally creepsville.
    Anyways…. lovely post my dear, and I sincerely hope that the joy you give with this blog is returned to you, because your blog is pretty fantastic. like I said, I am a newbie, but someday I hope to have a blog as successful and heartfelt as yours.
    Enjoy your day off!

  • Jessica R on said:

    I completely agree. Being a teacher for years and ow a new blogger, it's hard not to take the negative comments and sentiments personally, but there is so many more which are positive. And like you said: delete the mean.

  • Mandy Chiappini on said:

    Thanks for reposting this!!! I also think it's ridiculous when people continue to read a blog that they don't like. It's like they sit around complaining about it, but they can't stop going back to it. It's like a form of crack for some people, they are addicted to being mean. I just don't get it. I have unfollowed lots of blogs because the content no longer appealed to me. I don't think that's mean at all, I think it's honest and the right thing to do. I'd much rather someone unsubscribe to my blog, than continue to roll their eyes every time they see a new post or read something I have to say that they don't like. People are just crazy.

  • Julie on said:

    As a new reader of The Paper Mama I want to thank you for being so honest. I was unaware of your and Ruari's birth story and after reading this post went and read that incredibly moving account. Wow! I am still a little choked up about it which is unusual for me. I can't imagine anyone coming to your site and saying mean things. I find you to be cheerful and informative and am truly sorry that you have to deal with mean words let alone phone calls. (that blows my mind!) On your day off, I just want to send a note of thanks and positive energy your way. I have truly enjoyed finding the Paper Mama and continue to look forward to new things to get excited about (Hello, tumeric dyed lamp…loved it!)

    • The Paper Mama on said:

      That was a very wonderful and sweet comment. Thank you for the kind words! Brings a nice smile on my day off. 🙂

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