Almost daily I think about having another kiddo. I’d love to just say, “Yeah, let’s do this and create another life.” But, I can’t. I wish there was no risk for me carrying a baby. I wish the only decision we have to make is when to start trying. Unfortunately, that’s not the situation we’re in.

Every time I start doing the research and getting all the information for gestational surrogacy, I get overwhelmed by the cost/time/emotional stuff of it all. My husband and I have been wanting to start our journey to surrogacy for a while, but we recently learned our insurance will not cover this. We will have to cover 100% of the costs. It’s just another bump in the ‘ol road.

I know for a fact we will have another child. Whether it’s by surrogacy, or adoption, we will have a brother or sister for our kiddo. Both are a ton of money. Goodness. Sooooooo, that brings me to my Go Fund Me. It’s a site dedicated to raising money for people/situations/whatever. I set up a page to begin raising money for surrogacy. In addition to the fundraising page, I hope to set up a silent auction and maybe a raffle? All in the near future.

In case you don’t know why I can’t carry another kiddo, here’s a quick catch up…

The backstory:

In December 2009 I was 36 weeks pregnant and ended up in the ER with contractions coming every minute with a lot of pain. After many tests the doctors couldn’t find anything wrong. The baby was fine, and I obviously was not. It was decided that my appendix may have burst. When I was put under and the surgeon started to work, blood poured out of my abdomen. My simple appendectomy turned into cesarean/life saving surgery. I flatlined four times and lost most of my blood. Somehow my daughter was perfectly fine and only needed a resuscitation from me being put under.

It turns out my uterus had ruptured. I have a bicornuate uterus (this means it’s heart shaped) and it tore at the seam. Just a tear the size of a dime, yet my little baby was still getting blood.

A uterine rupture can occur if the pregnant woman had previous surgery on her uterus. Before pregnancy I had NEVER had surgery of any kind, especially not on my uterus. I’ve been told there may have been a weak spot and the combo of my growing baby and movement caused the tear. According to my doctors, they could not find any record of a uterine rupture without past surgery happening, so it’s pretty much a mystery.

I have no guarantee that another pregnancy won’t cause another tear. The doctors just don’t know. What I DO know is I have my daughter, family and myself to live for. The risk is not worth it.

The entire surrogate process is so expensive, and that’s why I set this up. Side note: I definitely don’t expect this Go Fund Me to cover everything, I just hope it helps. We’re also saving money, applying for grants, and doing what we can (without going into extreme debt).

- Chelsey and Mike

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If you have a Wednesday post, please feel free to link it up below. And, feel free to link up to these blogs too… Parenting by Dummies, Project Alicia, Jenni from the Blog, In The Moment With, and Live and Love Outloud.

Remember my little goal to dress up at least 3 times a week? I set this goal in February and I’m happy to say I’ve stuck with it. I get out of my lazy/yoga pants and step into something lovely at LEAST 3 days a week (sometimes it’s four or five). I can tell this small change has helped my self-esteem. It’s just so simple, but getting dressed in a lovely skirt and some pretty tights changes my mood. I can feel my energy level go up, and I just plain feel better. Most days I can only manage to get my kiddo into “real clothes” and I wander out of the house with toothpaste on my face. Yeah… I even forget to look in the mirror. This goal also includes putting a small bit of makeup on, at least 3 times a week.

The majority of the time my makeup routine only consists of putting on mascara. Adding some length and darkness to my lashes makes me believe I’m not as tired as I feel. Ha! When I’m feeling super fancy, maybe on date nights, I’ll add a bit of lipstick.

I have really dry skin, and for that reason I don’t use foundation or cover up that often. Especially all over my face. It enhances the dry spots…  <—– Not my goal. I also love my freckles and never want to cover them, buuuut I do love it under my eyes (and to cover up the occasional blemish). I’ve yet to find something that really works for what I want (and at a price I can handle), but Almay sent me some Smart Shade Mousse to try out. I love it!

It’s pretty neat. It starts off white (as seen on my finger above) and quickly changes to match the shade of my skin, like magic. P.S. A little goes a long way. It’s light and soft, and it smooths out to cover the darkness under my eyes.

I’ve been using it almost nonstop for a week now. Even on the days I choose to wear yoga pants (and maybe have toothpaste on my face). It may be difficult to see a difference looking at my before and after photos in this post, but looking in the mirror at home: totally see it. I’ll be dressing up FOUR times this week. Date night tonight with the husband! Yay! That means cute shoes, a dress, and makeup! No yoga pants this time. Maybe I’ll add some eyeshadow (I’m trying out the Almay intense i-color)?

Check out Almay’s website for more information about their products and don’t forget to like Almay on Facebook!

Tell me, what’s your go-to date night look?

Answer this question below, and each comment will automatically be entered for $100 Visa gift card! Use that treat for your own little date night!

- Chelsey

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My sweet little girl was born almost 4 weeks early. It was a crazy emergency where both of us could have lost our lives. In fact, multiple doctors told me that if the tear in my uterus was just slightly this, or that way: my kiddo wouldn’t have received any blood/oxygen from me. Aka: this would not be a happy ending. My kiddo was amazing and completely ready for the world at the time of my emergency, but still spent a half day in care of some WONDERFUL nurses at the hospital (all while I remained in surgery).

I mean… even though I chose to do a natural and drug free water birth, my life was saved from modern medicine. Thank goodness.

This is my third year walking for the babies. This is so important for me to raise money for. How many little lives have been saved from new technology and research? I don’t know, and it doesn’t matter. Why? Cause we are saving the lives of a baby that someone chose to bring into this world. Even though my kiddo was healthy enough to come into this world early, some babies are not. I’m going to walk for all those sweet kiddos that need help. I’m going to walk for my kiddo. I’m walking for ME.

I flatlined. Multiple times. Modern technology saved me. Saved my life. Modern technology saves the lives of kid’s born too early. I support that. I’m passionate about this. That’s why I will march for babies in May, and if you want to (and have the means) you can donate to my walk. Every bit counts. If donations aren’t in your budget, you can also look into walking FOR FREE in your town. You can check out where to walk in your area.

SO, if you can (and want to) you can click below to donate. Thank you so much!

- Chelsey

P.S. if you’d like to ready my original birth story (written 3 years ago), you can click here.

The weather is getting warmer, then cold and rainy, then warm again, and more rain, and then some more sun…. It’s Spring in Oregon! That means 25% of the time I might be wearing skirts or shorts! That ALSO means my legs, that haven’t seen sun in months, will be out to show the world how PALE they are. I’m talking: the sun reflects off them and it will blind you. It’s a hazard.

During the Fall and Winter I like to wear colorful tights, but not for Spring style. While I’m waiting for my legs to get a bit more color, I love to use tights. I have quite the collection, but for this outfit I picked out this pair of Hanes Nude tights (they cost under $6) to pretend my legs aren’t super duper pale. It’s like I haven’t missed any sunny days. It also covers the bumps and bruises I seem to get from being a mom.

Random story moment: One of my earliest memories of the first time I noticed someone wearing tights was when I was in kindergarten. I looked down at my teachers sandals and noticed a web of something over her toes… I asked her what it was and she said, “OH, those are just my tights. I wear them to cover all those crazy purple spidery veins!” You could say that this may have scared the poo outta me as a 6 year old. When you get older you get giant purple veins covering your legs? What?

{shirt: f21//skirt: very old Anthropologie//control top silky sheer nude tights: c.o. Hanes//shoes: c.o. Blowfish}

Now I’m the thirty year old wearing tights. My kindergarten teacher had the right idea. Ok, are you into tights?

- Chelsey

I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls Collective, and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.